He threw a pillow at me which hit me in the face and told me to shut the fuck up! I remember blacking out, going into a rage and wanting to kill him. I completely snapped as I previously vowed that NO one would ever abuse me again! When my fist didn’t suffice, I picked up the closest thing; his crutch which broke as I hit him with it. After three days of complete foolishness and his second attempt at physical aggression, I’d had enough! I wanted him out of my house but he was refusing to leave. I had no idea who this total asshole was but I knew I didn’t want to be with him anymore! I called my mom (who I knew would handle the situation more calmly than I) to assist me with his removal.
After careful observation and further investigation, my mom who is also a nurse, concluded that my boyfriend seemed to be having an adverse reaction to his pain medication. As I took the time to listen to her, I realized that it was in fact after his knee surgery which had been three days prior that this demon appeared. From the time we came home from the hospital, he began acting like a paranoid schizophrenic. He’s normally a little jealous so initially I didn’t pay the craziness much attention. However by nightfall, his antics had completely worn me out. He kept me up until 4:00am with accusations of betrayal and started up again the next day. There were moments of sanity and during those times he would apologize for his bad behavior. I continued to medicate him per the doctor’s orders and he continued to move in and out of this delusional behavior for two more days.
Thankfully after my mother’s determination, he wanted to stop taking that particular medication. He has since returned to the loving man I fell in love with. Although I grew up with an uncle who was addicted to street drugs that caused him to do some crazy things, this was still a first for me. This was the first time I witnessed such an extreme alter in someone’s personality up close and honestly, I’m having a hard time getting over it. I love him dearly and in his normal state I find him completely irresistible! However, I can’t help but wonder if ole Ike Turner will show up again. Now I’m paranoid although I do believe this was out of his character. It’s obvious by my reactions that I’m NOT over some things from my past.
We call experiences into our life for a reason and I believe I called this into my life to heal some places in me. I’m grateful for life; my greatest teacher. The longer I live; life continues to bring experiences that bring healing and also help me to be more compassionate. I’m grateful that I don’t live with someone addicted to drugs but my heart goes out to the family that does. For us, it was as simple as determining this medication was harmful and deciding not to use it again. For those suffering from addiction, it’s not that easy. My heart goes out to the loved one who has to deal with the addiction and all that comes along with it. After three days I was totally emotionally exhausted and can’t imagine living that nightmare with no end in sight. I’m struggling to open my heart again but I’m eager to see how this unfolds. I’m grateful that this experience was short lived but I MUST learn and heal what needs to be healed because I NEVER want to experience this again!